“for i am forever changing”

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Hahaha I found this online and I think it's really true.
The most common and popular lies that girls will tell:

1. I'm fine 
2. I can cook 
3. I don't care/it doesn't matter 

And of course, everyone wonders, just why?

Excluding the second one (LOL), girls tell these lies because, honestly, nobody wants to fit into the "crazy controlling girlfriend" stereotype.

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The problem with girls is that they always expect you to know what they're thinking and what they want without actually saying it to your face.

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It was so so hard to walk home from school today. I was carrying so much stuff. And it was sort of bulky. I had my school books too and my violin. I didn't really know how to balance everything in my arms and my violin added so much extra weight to my load.

My arms are dead now :( but not as bad as before.
They were shaking when I finally got home and put everything down. I couldn't even lift them.
My hands, which are normally so cold, were burning.
Well, my hands are back to normal now at least.

My arms will hurt so much tomorrow. My muscles were so strained!! SO SAD :(

Goshes I'm such a complainer.

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I went walking today. I like walking.
- I like listening to Eliza's dad's songs when I'm walking. Haha. Old people music, she said

I turned off  my computer because no one was on msn or free to talk or whatever, so I was feeling just a little bit (ahem) lonely. And so so restless. And kind of down. I had nothing to do, so I wanted to go outside and walk with myself. Or whatever. Because solitary walks are kind of relaxing. (weirdo)
I walk with my iPod.

Anyway, I turned off my computer and looked outside and subsequently freaked out because it was so dark already. But my laptop was already shutting down... and I really wanted to get of the house and do something. So I left quickly. (WHAT A NINJA)

It was kind of cold. I walked through Central Park not knowing if I wanted a longish walk or a short one, as my mother would be getting home soon and it was cold and dark and whatnot.
Central Park has so many pathways leading off to different streets and whatever. I sort of just wandered. After a while, as it got darker, I got a little apprehensive about this whole idea of walking in the dark. I kind of (not really) had an idea of where I was walking, but with the darkness, everything seemed different.
Predictably, I then whipped out my handy dandy notebook iPhone to check the map. Only, it didn't work. Sad face.
So I walked just a little faster.

Finally I got to Lincoln Park. I slowed a bit and then saw an outline of a man sitting on a bench. I looked around at all the bushes in the shadows and thought about how easy it would be for someone to just rush out  from the darkness and stab me. I got really scared (wimp). I sped up quite a bit (I couldn't even properly see the ground where I was walking) until I got to Manhattan (RELIEF). There were street lamps again!

This point was probably the lowest point of my walk. As in my mood was sort of.. um. Melancholy. (Oh awks. Sorry)
My phone dinged. As in I got a text. Once again, I whipped it out all excited and stuff. Someone wanted to talk to me! Oops. Sad face once more?
I walked really really slow. Like more slowly than I usually do (hahaha). I took my phone out again, stared at it and decided to text my Jellybean. I was dispirited and kind of needy (ew isn't there a better word than that...), that's why.
I walked even slower after that. Some times even stopping fully. Would you text me back? Slow walk walk walk. Very very very very slow walk walk walk.
Phone dings.
Confident this time, I checked my phone, and sure enough, it was you. Big big waaaay big smile.
I believe I even skipped.
Wasn't even that dark anymore.
Kept walking, a little faster this time. It was getting colder. But I decided to take the long way home.
And then, well, I got home, all refreshed from my walk.

You have no idea how happy you can make me.
With just one text.
Or just by seeing your name on my screen.
Happy face. With teeth.

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So recently, more and more, I've been feeling really weird.
It was only today that I realized that I've had this feeling another time before. Specifically on August 22 + 23.
(Ew, I'm such a nerd; keeping track of dates like this)
That time, the feeling was slightly different.
I don't know if it's good or bad.

There's also another weird feeling that I've been feeling lately. It's been getting stronger and kind of more upsetting. It leads to other thoughts that I'd rather not think about and worries that I'd really rather not worry about.
Yeah, for this, I know for sure that it is bad.
Sorry.

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Never far from my thoughts, you are.
Always, no matter what I'm doing, you're guaranteed a spot in some corner of my mind.

You're like a fly: annoying... buzzing here and there, to the centre of my attentions and back into the corner again.
...
But you're my fly.
So I'll happily put up with it ~

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Haha... I'm always saying how annoying and nagging my mother can be... always telling me stupid stuff like "go shower!" or "put on your seatbelt!" or "look out for bad guys!" or "don't answer the phone when it rings!" ...

But when my little cousin came to visit...
I would always tell her, "Put on your jacket already! It's so cold!"
And seriously, she's like fifteen. Hahaha, I'm turning into my mother.

Oh, ew :(

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